Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Life After "Marked for Death"


Even though Seagal first burst on the scene w/ Above the Law in 1988, it wasn't until two feature films later, with Hard to Kill, did he achieve his dream of having a firm grasp around Hollywood's scrotum.  Dragging 'em to-and-fro, he was able to release such bonafied classics as Out For Justice, Marked For Death and the peculiarly titled Fire Down Below, without skipping a skull-crack.  


I mean, what kid in the late 80s/early 90s didn't constantly remind you about how badass Seagal was? Remember the fight in the pool hall?! Or the time when he just wanted to get some groceries and happened to end up murdering everyone in the store?! Or when he battled the crazy machete-wielding Screwface and his gang of Jamaicans -- and proceeded to totally break all of the bones in all of their bodies with one hand, while on his knees?!!

Well, I was just doing my monthly check-up on the guy, and am here to inform you that he's got a new song, "Hoochie Koochie Man", on his Myspace page.

"Wait, what?!@  You didn't know that Seagal had a Myspace page?~!   You didn't know that Seagal fronts a band?!!  And that his band was featured on the cover of Big City Rhythm & Blues Magazine?!?!!"

Well, while you're shamefully playing Seagal-catch-up, might as well listen to one of the tunes written by the legendary face-smasher.
  


Non-Seagal fight scene:


Also while i was doing intensive research, i found this:

It pretty much shits on all other fight scenes, ever!

1 comment:

Woods said...

1. All of his best movies follow the "3 word title" rule, EXCEPT for

2. You forgot Under Siege starring Gary Busey!!! One of the Buse's finest villain moments, EXCEPT for

3. Predator 2, Point Break, and Lethal Weapon (Mr Joshua in the house!!!).